The Art of the Solo Vacation After Divorce
The first time I considered a solo vacation after my divorce, the thought was quickly followed by a wave of anxiety. For years, every trip, every holiday, every weekend getaway had been a joint venture.
So, with a deep breath and a perhaps overly optimistic outlook, I booked a week-long trip to Portugal. My destination? Lisbon, a city I knew nothing about beyond what Google Images told me.
The initial moments were, predictably, awkward. I caught myself habitually reaching for my phone to share a moment, a view, a funny observation, only to remember there was no "we" on the other end anymore.
Yet, this awkwardness slowly began to morph into something else: freedom. There was no need to compromise on what sights we saw, what time we ate, or how long we lingered in a particular spot. If I wanted to spend three hours in a tiny, obscure ceramics shop in Alfama, I could.
One afternoon, I found myself wandering through the narrow, winding streets of the Mouraria district, completely lost, but in the best possible way. I stumbled upon a small, open-air café. I ordered a coffee, sat down, and just listened. There was no conversation to maintain, no itinerary to adhere to. It was just me, the music, and the authentic pulse of the city.
The solo journey also forced me into unexpected interactions. Without a companion, I was more open to striking up conversations with locals, with other solo travelers. I learned about Lisbon’s history from a street vendor, discovered a hidden viewpoint from a fellow traveler on a tram, and even shared a laugh with a group of Portuguese football fans. These were connections I might never have made if I’d been ensconced in the comfort of a shared experience.
By the end of that week, I felt a shift. It wasn’t a magical cure for all the lingering pain of divorce, but it was a powerful step forward. I had proven to myself that I could not only survive on my own but thrive. I could plan, navigate, problem-solve, and find joy in solitude. I returned home not just with souvenirs, but with a renewed sense of self-reliance and an unshakable confidence in my own company.
Hasib Afzal